In England, monarchs not born in the summer have two birthdays – the day they were actually, physically born and a day when the weather is much more likely to be fit for a Birthday Parade.
I also have two birthdays.
The first, defined by my official date of birth more than 40 years ago, is always a cold, wintery affair that, if I were to become queen, would certainly justify an additional and altogether warmer, sunnier and drier annual celebration. My second birthday is not a summer’s day though. It is today, 29th September 2024.
Today is the first day in my more than 40 years that I have taken ADHD medication following my diagnosis last week.
Today, I am patient.
I have never been patient before. In fact, I am usually incredibly impatient. Usually I finish other people’ sentences, butt in, feel like there is a compulsion within me to get on with everything faster than it seems to be naturally occurring, to get onto the next thing because an invisible motor is driving me to complete everything immediately…
Today, I have sat and played with my three children. I have listened to them – really listened to everything they are saying to me and marvelled for what seems like the first time at the wonderful, individual ways they express themselves. My husband and I collaborated to help our eldest boy with his history essay. I suggested we take it in turns to give feedback on each paragraph. I stuck to that. I didn’t take over. I wasn’t dismissive. I enjoyed listening to what my husband had to say.
Today, I am present.
Today, I think I must be more like everyone else; or, at least more like the 97% of the human population who don’t have ADHD.
I read that back and think to myself ‘anyone reading this is going to think unmedicated me is a complete liability - that unmedicated me doesn’t play or listen or share and is too busy rushing into the future to really enjoy right now’. It’s not quite as black and white as this page.
I have patiently generated this website today and I intend to talk openly, honestly and semi-anonymously about ADHD. I am aspiring novelist E F Holland but you can call me Erica-Fay.
Today is my happy birthday for which I hope there will be many happy returns.
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